Lately

Alright folks! (Which I think lately has been reduced to Trevor and occasionally Janine?) I would like to inform you that I have not forgotten about you! I simply have been doing my writing offline lately. I have been healing through art just as I have always done, just nothing has made it onto my blog in the past couple weeks. I do not know why this is but I do know that for some strange reason there is meaning behind it. I guess some healing is just meant ot be kept to yourself and not known to the entire world should they choose to view it.
*
If you know me well, then you are aware of the things that have been going on in my life lately. At first when everything was dumped on me over the period of only a few short days, the only thing I could think of was, 'Why the hell is all this happening to me at once? Do I not get a breather? No heal time between doeses?" And then I thought about it, and as suckish as everything is, I'm glad it all happened when it did. Why drag it out and have one terrible thing happen, then just as I begin to heal throw another at me and tear me down all over again?

These last few days have really shown me who in my life is really worth keeping around. Who is there to talk when I need someone and who approaches me knowingly, with out me even having to say a word. I think I needed this down time to see for real who's available. I know now that there are a few people I have hopelessly been trying to hold onto, and as I attempt to reconnect with them now, they have only shown me that I just need to let go and focus all of my attention on those that are making an effort in my life.

Things have been looking brighter lately and I have recently filled my life with an abundance of new people that seem to come from a world where the sun is right here on earth and who you are is the greatest thing you have to give. In otherwords, they are very happy, upbeat, outgoing people and I am overly greatfull to have them in my life. One inpreticular stands out in the group and he has unknowingly encouraged me to be cheerful and to always be myself. Whick I have been putting more effort towards lately. I'm getting very sick of hiding and I'm ready to show whoever's watching just who I really am.

My life in these last few weeks has been more filled with friends and activity than ever before and even when I'm on my own I have been more motivated than I have in a while. Things are getting done and it has given me a great feeling of pride and accomplishment.

Also work lately has been a weird source of my happiness. I always love my job.. well 95% of the days, but recently, I have been leaving after my shift with a very warm feeling of acceptance. Maybe I'm just realizing it more now, or maybe the connections and relationships with co-workers have grown stronger recently. Either way, I leave work feeling like I am just as much a part of their family as their own siblings. Weird? Doesn't matter if it is, I really like it and it makes me look forward to work everyday.

So that's a wrap up of my life lately, sorry I haven't been more revealing. Thank you to those of you who actually take the time to check up on me through my blog.
And I am very curious to know just who that is so even if you have absolutely nothing to say to this post, please leave a comment, even if it's just one of these do dads --> ~ @ $ * so that I can get a head count [= Thanks all.

(P.S. Spell check is down, hugely pet peeving me, so I apologize for any errors.)